"Just Spank the Child??!"

I am so sick and tired of hearing people say "Just Spank him or her!"  To me, choosing to spank for any and every infraction is the lazy, easy way out.  Being a parent is hard and requires a lot of sacrifice and patience.  Kids are simply little people who have their own thoughts, opinions, wants and needs and it is up to us the parent to lead and guide them.  Do I believe in spanking?  Yes, but done in love and not violently or as a way to break a child's spirit.  My dad was from the old school and truthfully I believe he went over board, like so many other black parents of his day and generations back.  To me, many black parents, particularly from the South continued the "slave plantation" tradition of whipping a child into submission.  I hate it!

I think being a great parent requires knowing how to get your child to think and make wise choices, and this is taught not by spanking all the time.  Talking with your child and making sure he or she has as understanding about certain things can assist in reinforcing right from wrong.  Especially when a child becomes of a certain age.  You have to also learn your child and see what methods of discipline may work for them.  For my oldest child, we have spanked here and there, but if we take away a privilege that she loves, she really gets the message.  I think it is demoralizing and psychologically damaging to make a child take off their clothes and "whip" them in their underwear or nude.  I find that abusive, however, there are many many parents that think this is good parenting.

 How would you feel if someone told you to take off all your clothes and then proceed to hit you with a switch?  I will never forget a spanking I got and how a part of my self-esteem and zest for living was literally beat out of me.  I felt like crap.  I was too old for the spanking and the infraction I committed was not even an infraction.  I personally think my dad spanked me to make himself feel in control.  And isn't that why so many parents opt to grab a switch or belt without hesitation.  To show that they are in control and/or not to be embarrassed in the eyes of bystanders.   How many times have you been in a store and you see a child act up and then you see the parent look terribly embarrassed?  Don't let your own pride make you loose your mind and apply a spanking when the infraction may not call for it.

Yes, I do believe that spanking can work if and when it is done out of love and not harshly, but there are many other methods that just might work better you take time and think!